Mario Goes To Washington D.C. With His Pet Turtle Named Brent is a video game for the Nintendo Baster 2, created in a joint effort by the Coke-Cola Company, Enron,
and Nintendo, with funding from the Bulgarian National Government. The game consists of Mario trying to save Gas Money in order to take a roadtrip to Washington D.C. in order to visit his local congressmen.
Worlds[]
- World 1: Illinois
- World 2: South Carolina
- World 3: Maine
- World 4: Puerto Rico
- World 5: East Germany
- World 7: Good Egg Galaxy (Acidic Version)
- World 8: Washington D.C.
- Bonus World: The Pizza Gates
Plot[]
The Game's Title Screen.
During the Oil Crisis during the 1970's, gas prices flew through the roof. Because of this, Mario would like to petition his local congressmen, and because Mario is literate and terrified of phone communication, he decides to drive down to Washing D.C. As well, he brings his pet turtle Brent for safety as he knows Kung Fu, and Mario could not find a babysitter. Mario goes through various Levels, collecting coins to to buy fuel for his car. In Illinous, Mario meets Tad and Joe Buckley (from the wildly popular podcast Let Me Tell You About), where they talk about Homestuck and eating chicken wings, as well as Butcher the Baker for over two hours in an unescapable cutscene. After Mario receives a Sip from them, Mario goes to the Sears Tower in Illinois to fight King Goomba, who is planning a largescale military coop. After this, Mario drives to South Carolina, where he collects coins in order to drive to Maine. However, in the line to buy a Chicken Bacon Ranch sub from Subway, he encounters Global Warming Garry, who states that he will 'melt the ice caps' in order to slurp up Mario's coins. After Gary is defeated, Mario eats his sub (With Cookie and Drink) and drives off to Maine. During Mario's Visit to maine, the Coke Cola bear is found on a beach, and provides the player with a forced advertisement for the Coke Cola brand, as well as their many delicious drinks such as Coke Cola, Minute Maid, Fanta, Vitamin Water, Dasani, and Pepsi. At the harbor, while boarding the Borealis (from Half Life 2), Mr. Glowie question's Mario's involvement in the 9/11 terrorist attacks. Because of this, Mario is forced to steal his car and run him over, as any good citizen would. This grants him the Terry Davis Token, which allows fast travel to all previous areas as well as Puerto Rico. After Mario arrives he meets Dale the Goldfish, who gives Mario training into Real Estate Sale. At this point a split path happens where Mario can either remain in Peurto Rico, selling houses, until all of his property is destroyed in Hurricane Maria, causing the Bad Ending. If Mario defects from Dale, he is forced to fight Rusty Metal Mario, who arrives from the ocean, and lives in the SS Maine shipwreck. After this tense battle, Mario smelts him down into scrap metal to create a boat, and sails all the way through the Indian Ocean and Panama Canal to East Germany. Here, Mario backward sidehops over the Berlin Wall, and subsequently encounters Colonel Paperclip, a former member of Bowser's Super Shell Division, who was transferred to America in order to help the war effort against the Soviet Union. Now under orders of Sheldon Stewart-Mars, he attempts to capture Mario into Castle Wolfenstein, but ultimately fails as Brent kicks him into submission. After his defeat Mario founds Paperclip's Super Secret Rocket plans, and hops on a super secrets NASA rocket into Good Egg Galaxy. Here Mario discovers the entirety of Luxemburg has succeeded from earth due to 'cringe overdose'. Here Mario finds the supreme suppressor of the Luxembourgians, Bacon Bits Luigi, who is implied to have starved and tortured the people of Luxemburg in order to say in rule. Mario kicks him in the balls and wins. After the defeat of the Supreme Overlord, the Baconator (trademarked) from Wendy's allows mario to exit Luxemburg's field of Gravity and plummet directly down into Washington D.C. As Mario arrives he finds the city in complete travesty, as Brent as set himself up as the Combine Overlord. Mario then has to organize a resistance force against him, eventually arriving at the White House and fighting Brent once and for all, with the aid of Ice Mike Pence. If Mario collects the 9.5 Power Saxophones, It is revealed that John Podesta set Brent up, and thus Mario must go to Comet Ping Pong Pizza in order to enter the Pizza Gates, where John Podesta takes the 7 Chaos Emeralds and turns into Super Podesta, and fights with 100,000 hotdogs. After he is defeated, All corruption from the american government dissapears, and Mario becomes president (with Ice Mike Pence as vice president). In the credits scene Brent is seen in Guantanamo Bay plotting his revenge against the American people.
Bosses[]
- World 1: King Goomba (Republican Aligned)
- World 2: Global Warming Garry
- World 3: Mr. Glowie (with vehicle)
- World 4: Rusty Metal Mario
- World 5: Colonel Paperclip (From Germany)
- World 6: Headcrab (From Half Life 2)
- World 7: Bacon Bits Luigi (controversial)
- World 8: Brent
- Bonus World: John Podesta (With chaos emeralds)
Playable Characters[]
- Sonic the Hedgehog
- Henry Clay (implied)
- Shadow Ronald Reagan
- Brent (Multiplayer only)
Non Playable Characters[]
- Chelsey the Goomba
- Dale the Goldfish
- Ice Mike Pence (former vice president)
- Tad Becker from Let Me Tell You About
- Joe Buckley
- The Coke Cola Polar Bear
- Luxemburg (The Entire Country)
- Sheldon Stewart-Mars (mentioned)
Critical Reception[]
The game upon release received critical appraise for having a unique story, as well as a DVD Documentary about the signing of the American Constitution. The game was pulled from shelves after the 9/11 attacks and was rereleased later as Mario Goes To Washington D.C. With His Pet Turtle Named Brent (9/11 was bad Edition). As well, Bacon Bits Luigi's character was deemed as inappropriate and offensive to children, however the game still sold nearly 3.8 billion copies.